Glastonbury · Town Crier · Uncategorized

How it all started

 

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Last week I was asked by a couple of people about how I came to be a Town Crier. It’s a question that many visitors ask every year, so here’s the full story about how I ended up “on the streets”, ringing a big bell and shouting my head off at the public.
As a supply teacher, I had been employed to teach science by Glastonbury’s secondary school, for the best part of a year, to cover a staffing gap in 2013.

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 St Dunstan’s  School, Glastonbury

It was on the very last day of the school year that, for me, a very significant event took place. It was the July end-of-term assembly and prize-giving ceremony. It was a blazing-hot day and I was stood at the back of their massive sports hall, along with several dozen other perspiring and totally exhausted teachers, teaching assistants and office staff, watching the proceedings. It’s always a delight on these occasions to applaud all those students who have won awards for their efforts, both in and out of the classroom.
Whilst standing there, I recognised one of my old pupils from when I was teaching at a different school not far away but about 20 years before. He was sat next to the Headteacher. He was dressed in a very smart suit. His father, Graham Coles, Glastonbury’s much-loved Town Crier, had sadly passed away a few months earlier and his son was there at the prize giving to present the “Graham Coles Memorial Cup” for outstanding achievement in sport.

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Graham Coles R.I.P.

I remember Graham with much affection; we were fellow radio amateurs and I also remember him from parents’ evenings as well, when I taught his boys.
Incidentally, by an amazing coincidence, the Town Crier before Graham was also a radio amateur (or radio “ham”)!  His name was Jim Bobbett. (His call sign is G0MSL, Graham’s was G0BKU and mine is M0BJO)

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Jim Bobbett

When I got home, I remember telling my wife, June, about Graham’s sad passing and the events of the last day of term. I ruminated with her on what a “fun” job it would surely be, to be the Town Crier of Glastonbury, being able to dress up and attend all those special events throughout the year. To be honest, I’d always fancied a crack at the job. In teaching, there’s always an element of “acting”, as any teacher will tell you. I would probably have enjoyed local amateur dramatics too, were it not for the fact that I just haven’t got the memory (nor patience!) to learn endless pages of lines. But in a Town Crier role, yes, I would be able to do a little “acting”, but the real bonus is that the “lines” would be written down on a scroll and I could just read them out. Perfect! The more I thought about the whole fandango, the more enthusiastic I became about the prospect of being a Town Crier.

However, I resigned myself to the thought that probably, the Town Council had already hired a replacement for Graham. I had a glance at the Town Council’s  website and sure enough, there was the advert for their Town Crier! However, my heart sank when I read the small print. I had missed the closing date for applications by four days! My dear wife June has always encouraged me; she is a wonderful optimist – she suggested I rattle off an application anyway and see what happens. That is what I did. Without delay, I hurriedly typed out an e-mail to the council, for what it was worth!
Several agonising months went by before I had a surprise communication from the Clerk of Glastonbury Town Council, inviting me to attend for an interview at the Glastonbury Town Hall. In the invitation it was explained that it would be a fairly informal interview but that at some stage during the interview, I would be expected to perform a “cry”.

The day of the interview came and so I made my way to the Town Hall with a little “cry” written out ready, just in case one was not supplied for me. As it happened, it was a pleasant, cosy chat with the Mayor and one other Town Councillor. I thought I fielded most of the questions very well. Then towards the end, they asked me to “do a cry”. Feeling rather smug I said: “Well, I just happen to have one written down here somewhere”, reaching into the inside pocket of my blazer. “I’ll just go to the end of this room”, I explained, as I started to get out of my chair, “I don’t want to deafen you!” Before I took my first step they said: “Oh, no – we want you to do it outside – at the Market Cross perhaps?” As we walked down the stairs to go outside, the caretaker rummaged in his dusty store cupboard and emerged  with a brass bell. He cheerily thrust it into my hand with a good luck wish and a bit of a wink. I was thinking to myself, just what would people make of seeing some guy ringing a bell and shouting at the top of his head, on a sunny late-summer’s evening, in the middle of town? Would I be carried away by the “men in white coats”? Would my friends quietly shake their heads in disbelief, walk on by and choose to avoid me in the future?  I consoled myself with the thought that this IS Glastonbury and compared to the many bizarre spectacles encountered in this eccentric little West Country town, this really would seem comparatively “normal”!
In the end, the interviewing panel opted to place me on the top step, infront of the Town Hall’s left side double doors.

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Glastonbury Town Hall

They scurried across the road and sat in a bus shelter on the other side of the road, outside of Glastonbury’s celebrated Italian restaurant, “GIGI’S”.

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GIGI’S

Steeling myself, I took in a big lung-full of air and belted out the following cry:

Oyez, Oyez, Oyez!
Goode Citizens of Glastonbury.
I am straightly commanded, to let it be known to all persons here gathered, that at the hour of seven of-the-clock this evening, an informal interview was conducted, for the honourable position of Town Crier of this fine town.
Mr David Alan Greenway, Schoolmaster, will be duly scrutinised on his suitability for the post.
Give heed and take note, that the interviewing panel will be: The Mayor of Glastonbury, Councillor Sue Thurgood and Councillor Denise Michell.
We wish them “good luck” in the execution of their municipal deliberations and trust that they will choose with their customary good wisdom.
God Save The Queen!

I heard the story later on, that midway through my “cry”, a party of diners had emerged from the restaurant and enquired as to why I was shouting my head off across the road. “It’s OK……he’s just auditioning for the post of Town Crier”, the panel explained. Apparently, one of the diners retorted, “He’s brilliant; give him the job!”

To use that well-known phrase:   “……..…..and the rest is history!”

Since the previous Town Crier expressed a wish to be buried in his regalia, a new outfit had to be made for me. A gifted local costumier, Cath Jenkins, was appointed to provide the new Town Crier livery. I didn’t know so many bits of me had to be measured to produce a new livery!

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Cath Jenkins, Costumier

We very soon decided on the style of livery for the new Town Crier’s coat.  Here is a photo from the front of the pattern book:

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Cath worked tirelessly in her studio, in Glastonbury’s Red Brick Building and I had to attend regularly for fittings and discussions. The green and black doeskin fabrics were ordered, along with about 3 miles of braid and a myriad of buttons of various sizes. Apparently, the ceremonial garments of the Members of the House of Lords are also made from doeskin, so I felt in good company!

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I  particularly like my buttons. They have “E II R” on every single one of them!  An emblematic link with the past, since once upon a time, Town Criers were the sole messengers of the reigning monarch.

Before Cath started cutting into the expensive doeskin, a mock-up was made from scrap fabrics – including an old tablecloth!

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Checking bell-ringing freedom of movement with the tablecloth mock-up!

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Cath making some waistcoat adjustments

The tricorn is quite unusual. It is lined with black chick and cock feathers as opposed to the usual single ostrich feather. Feathers are symbolic, as in the olden days, only a few people (including Town Criers) could read and write with a quill pen.

Eventually all was complete and once kitted out, I presented myself to the Town Council in full regalia, at one of their meetings in the Spring of 2014, where I performed a special cry, announcing that I was ready for Civic Duties.

My dream had finally come true.

 

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Bards · Druids · Glastonbury · Orchards · Tor · Wassailing

Wassail!

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Wassailing is a very ancient custom, particularly popular and strongly celebrated in the South West of England. Besides being a good excuse to drink lots of scrumpy (that’s cider……..  i.e. fermented apple juice, for my foreign readers), eat al-fresco, have a little sing-song and the odd dance or two, it is a custom to firstly ensure that any evil spirits are banished from orchards and secondly to encourage all the trees to grow well and basically, produce a bumper crop of apples in the following autumn.

 

Of course, the scientist in me is saying that no amount of yodelling, dancing and pouring of cider over the ground (such a criminal waste!) is going to help trees in the slightest to produce a brilliant crop. A couple of years ago I attended another Wassail event where several of the local gentlemen farmers fired shotguns upwards into the apple trees, producing a veritable “rain” of bark, twigs and lichen on all those watching from below.

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How on earth does this “Wassailing-with-Attitude” – as I call it – help the poor apple trees produce more fruit, I ask! Surely, raking-in a good general fertiliser around the base of the tree would do far better. Nowhere near as dramatic, photogenic and entertaining, however!

 

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A year ago, I read an advert for a Wassail on the Tor and as Town Crier, I decided to robe-up and put in an appearance, just for the fun of it. After all, I couldn’t be accused of “gate-crashing” in my own town, now, could I? The organiser spotted me (not too difficult, I guess) and I was immediately asked to perform an impromptu introduction for her. Then a month or two ago, I received an e-mail asking me if I could actually be the “Master of Ceremonies” for this year’s Wassail event. I suppose I must have done something right! There was an offer of free food and free cider; how could I possibly refuse?

Prior to the event, which is organised by the National Trust (as they are the wonderful guardians of our legendary Glastonbury Tor)  I received a two-page Health and Safety Risk Assessment. It was sent as a matter of routine to all those helping on the day.  I think it’s something that all organisers of public events are obliged, by law, to produce for staff. It made me laugh, nevertheless. I didn’t know that singing, eating, drinking cider and dancing in a field could be such a hazardous activity! (But there again, perhaps they have somehow or other got to hear about my evenings of occasional over-indulgence in cider drinking and of my complete inability to dance without injuring those nearby!)

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I arrived early to park my car in a very muddy field, robe up and then collect my “free-cider and food” tickets! Luckily, I had my script sent to me, so I was good to go. When I arrived, the Morris Dancers were already entertaining the assembling crowd.

I duly did my introduction and official welcome at the allotted time and things got underway.

The first event was to get all two hundred assembled Wassailers to sing Wassail songs beneath each tree in the orchard. Such a nice touch, I thought……. giving each apple tree that bit of individual attention. I’m sure the apple trees appreciated it. There were a lot of trees in the Avalon Orchard, I might add!

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Whilst all this was going on, I was notified by the organiser that the BBC “Points West” News video crew had just arrived and wanted to film me doing a bit of my introduction that they missed. I obliged. I hope my bell ringing and subsequent shouting did not distract all the “singing to the trees” that was progressing in earnest!

The assembled Merry Wassailers were also encouraged to tie small tags to the branches of the “Blessing Tree” with brief notes, explaining “how the Glastonbury Tor was important to them”.

Later on, I announced for all gathered, to assemble round the Blessing Tree, where the main Wassail Ceremony would be performed by the Order of Bards, Ovates and Druids.

Once the ceremony was over, further participation from the assembled crowds was requested. A big basket of toast was suddenly produced……yes dry, cold toast was thereupon offered to all. Not to eat, I hasten to add, but to place on the branches of the Blessing Tree!

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Apparently, this helps too! Watching the Wassailers adorning the Blessing Tree with slices of brown bread, I couldn’t help think that the bread was going to help the local bird population far more than the apple tree. But there again, birds eat insects and grubs that might possibly harm the trees, I thought to myself……… so perhaps it might help the trees indirectly.  I’m such an over-thinker at times!

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The final and most captivating event, in my book, was the Story Teller. He was a most friendly, approachable and charming gentleman. I chatted to him for a while before introducing him.

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We all assembled around the fire – a more intimate gathering now, as quite a few had left, probably having had enough of the cold, damp January air.

He told engaging stories of dragons, apples, eagles, glass mountains, knights in shining armour, princesses and castles.

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The children were enthralled – as was the Town Crier!

Looking forward to my next Wassail.

Glastonbury · Town Crier · Zombies

Zombies!

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Glastonbury is legendary for a host of reasons. Its parades, processions and staged events, for example, make headlines locally, nationally and internationally. Whenever I’m a long way from Glastonbury, perhaps chatting in a bar half way round the world and I happen to mention Glastonbury, I find that people have usually heard of the “Glastonbury Festival”, at the very least. I can talk from first-hand experience of this event, having talked to the assembled festival-goers from the Pyramid Stage and having also performed there more times than Tom Jones!

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This annual rock and pop extravaganza, that always hosts the big names in the pop industry, sees something like 150,000 followers descend on a small village called Pilton, which is actually about seven miles from Glastonbury!

Before and after this long weekend of music, mayhem and mud, the roads are clogged with cars for miles on end and it becomes something of a local obligatory pastime to try and find routes to and from work or just about anywhere else, which avoid the experience of being trapped in a five hour nose-to-tail crawl!

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Once the revellers are all safely gathered in, paradoxically, Glastonbury becomes something of a ghost town for the weekend, although there are steps to make this less so.

The processions of a religious nature occur in July. They close the streets for these, as thousands of pilgrims make their way slowly to the Glastonbury Abbey. I have to attend these events along with members of Glastonbury Town Council and our Mayor.

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We also have two events that are now well-entrenched in the Glastonbury calendar. I refer of course, to the Beltane (May Day) procession and the associated revelry and merriment.

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The other event, around Halloween, is the Samhain Wild Hunt.

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Both are now accompanied by Red and White Dragons, copious drummers, Morris Dancers and literally thousands in fancy dress – all with painted faces. For a few hours it’s a photographer’s dream – a photographic paradise. We usually make the National press, at these times, such is the incredible spectacle that this town uniquely and almost effortlessly generates.

Also at Halloween, we usually have our Zombie Walk. But this year, owing to road works on the diversion route, it had to be postponed until December 9th. Consequently, our marauding Zombies had the backdrop of a beautiful Christmas Tree in our town centre. Well, everyone enjoys a zombie-infested Christmas, don’t they?

 

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The event was organised by the excellent Children’s World charity. It was a great success. I managed to avoid being “got at” by the zombies this year. Last year, however, I was not so lucky!

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We had Druids in the town too on the same day, but they seemed to generally keep themselves confined to the Town Hall. Usually, the Zombies parade on the same day as the fairies assemble for their Fairy Ball. As you probably gather, it’s never dull here in Glastonbury!

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As Town Crier, I look upon it as my civic duty to warn the local citizens of the impending zombie invasion and I did this for most of the day, well into the evening.

by geoff corris2

But before all that took place, I was booked for an interview by my friend Danielle Silver. She has interviewed lots of Glastonbury people and today it was my turn. I was very thankful that the interview took place in a warm local café, as there was a bitingly cold north wind that day. Here is the interview:

 

After the interview you can hear me warning about the Zombies…..that’s also on the same youtube channel.
I’ve had a few close shaves with the Zombies in the past. I got set upon by a few years ago and Jason Bryant, our local press photographer, was there to record the macabre event.

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The zombies can be very realistic with their makeup with eyes popping out, fake rotting flesh and half decayed brains spilling out of their skulls.

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A new addition is the “Flashmob” based on Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” which lightens the event with music and some expert choreography.

I had quite a long time after my interview to circulate around town and chat with some of my local friends.

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AT 5 pm, I duly introduced our Mayor, Cllr. Emma George who made a short speech before cutting the tape with her customary great style, unleashing those zombies onto the High Street, once again.

It would be lovely if you could donate to such a worthy charity. Any sum,  however small, can be used to help children in such a unique way!  I’ll leave the link below.  Thank you, in advance.

https://localgiving.org/charity/childrensworld/

by geoff corris

Fairies · Glastonbury

Fairies and Fantasy

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Last time I was crying in Glastonbury High Street, my good friend Guy came up to me and asked if I’d mind doing a bit of publicity for a new art shop that was opening in town. Naturally, I agreed.

I get to attend quite a few shop openings or refurbishments locally. It’s always a delight to make a big noise at such times. When many town centres are slowly dying, it’s so heartening to see that Glastonbury continues to bustle with commercial life!

I was asked to publicise a new gift/art shop called “Rogues’ Gallery”. Usually at these events, I’m there on my own, bellowing out the good news not only for local citizens but also for the many visitors that flood into the town from all over the world. But, today it was going to be different. I was to have two “escorts” for the day. Guy was going to be wearing the Colonial Marine armour from the film “Aliens”. He would be carrying a replica machine gun. My other escort, his friend John, would be wearing full Medieval armour, complete with helmet and carrying a broad axe.

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(Photo by Patricia Raven)

To say there was some photography on the day would be a bit of an understatement!

We slowly clanked, rang, cried and posed our way round the centre of Glastonbury, my crying voice holding up well for a full four hours!

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One hilarious highlight occurred near to our local Viking accessories shop, “Sheildmaiden”.  I was just about to ring my bell and launch forth into a cry, when the front door of No. 8 opened. The occupier needed to know why a man in camouflage wearing an army helmet, holding a large machine gun, happened to be standing right outside of his kitchen window! Well, who wouldn’t?

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Although Storm Brian was ravaging the UK, we got away with fairly good weather, apart from the strong wind that nearly blew my tricorn off a couple of times. Feathers were ruffled! The only time it rained heavily, Guy and I had adjourned to the George and Pilgrims for a swift half. Crying really hammers the vocal cords and they need frequent lubrication, as I’m sure you can understand.

Being Halloween season, the “G ‘n P” (as the locals affectionately call it) I noted, had spared no expense to decorate their rooms accordingly. The very poorly lit, stone-floored, centuries-old coaching hotel lends itself very well to a judicious sprinkling of ghouls, grim reapers and witches. I am indebted to my good friend Lisa Ann for her photos of its interior, which captures the atmosphere of the place really well. I scared myself half to death on returning from the gents, completely unaware of a skeleton in an alcove, with lights in its eye sockets, just standing there, behind a veil of gauze. A stiff brandy and I was good to go!

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For my services, I was presented with a little financial remuneration, a bottle of mead – once again, the vocal cords thoroughly approved – and a signed print of “Boadicea” by Chris Achilleos, the renowned fantasy artist.

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I’d lost track of time, as I was chatting with someone outside of the shop. I was just about to rattle off another routine publicity cry, prior to the official opening, when suddenly the two stars of the day appeared: Chris Achilleos, and Terry English, the world-famous armourer for films such as Aliens, Excalibur, Gladiator, King Arthur, Harry Potter, Joan of Arc……. Out of the corner of my eye, I also spotted her worship the Mayor, resplendent in her red robes, standing with scissors poised, ready to cut the tape. Alongside all of them, about 50-60 people suddenly seemed to appear from nowhere and photographers – including the press – were all stood in front of me in the road, taking photographs, holding up the traffic in both directions! Needless to say, I gave it the full, theatrical, 105 decibels!

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Of course, it wasn’t just the shop opening that was causing a bit of a stir in Glastonbury. The town was also awash with fairies from the UK and abroad, for the “Fairy Fayre and Ball”. Our huge Town Hall is the venue for this event, with fairy-related stalls and merchandise cramming the hall during the daytime on Saturday and Sunday. I took a stroll around the stalls, in between crying, to catch up with a few friends.

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Wendy does fabulous stained glass work.

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Soso creates breathtakingly beautiful dragons and other mystical creatures.

The Saturday evening is given over to The Ball, danced away under the two magnificent chandeliers that hang in the Town Hall. All the ladies look very elegant in their finest fairy outfits – all with wings attached, of course.

Below, my good friend Linda Ravenscroft, undoubtedly one of the major “fairy coordinators” in town,  rounds up her fairies in the G ‘n P, ready to grace the ball with even more glamour!

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Alas, here is poor John. After trailing around with the Town Crier all day, he works tirelessly, well into the night; it’s hard work being a knight in Avalon!

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Wings all fitted – a few final adjustments – and the stunningly beautiful Penny from  Essex, is ready to fly!

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Even the dogs have to look their best!

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